headspace

Weird, weird few months lately. Lots going on and it would be really easy to try and ignore it all, but I think it’s getting to that point when I have to do the grown-up thing and face up to some stuff. Not really loving the idea.

This is the kind of time when I hate having such a bad long-term memory. It’s pretty much my childhood & teen years that I can’t remember, which means it’s pretty much all my formative experiences that are missing. This doesn’t help when I have big scary, potentially life-changing decisions to make and essentially no previous experience to draw on. I don’t remember what the inside of my school looked like, I don’t remember the first time I had sex, I don’t remember what my last job interview was like, I don’t remember any of the American teen dramas I used to watch that I’m sure covered every kind of crisis at one time or another…

There’s always the option of channelling my frustration into artistic endeavours, but short of Jackson Pollock-ing the front garden from the living room window (I’m on the upper floor) I’m not sure how cathartic it would actually be.

In other, not unrelated, news I’d forgotten how comforting the smell of Jack Daniels is.

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